Woke up with the sunrise after less than four hours of sleep, which means almost no sleep to me. Not sure why or what caused the distraction – maybe that turkish coffee at the end of the dinner which I am not used to having it that late anymore – but here I am. Good morning world, it is 5:04am in Istanbul.

I felt like waking up since the music in my head was too loud, the lyrics were on repeat over and over again. Trying to stop the song but didn’t happen – so I wrote. l literally had to get up and start writing my morning pages. I think that was the reason of me waking up since my morning routine of jotting down three pages got distracted a little. That’s what happens when I am at home, I get a little too excited to spend every single minute on all the things I have been missing so it’s a little bit of new routine of “catching up” which basically means information overdose. The longer you are away from home, there is more to catch up on. Some of them are more major than the others and does not necessarily mean that they are all good news. You get exposed to highs and lows of the stories. Exciting and happy like visiting a new born baby on one side, rocky and rough like some legit health problem stories on the other side. All of them hitting your system at the same time, feels like hard to digest – even as a listener.

It’s an interesting experience though since it forces you to be a real listener – vs waiting your turn to speak. Genuinely hearing someone and trying to get into the deeps of their hearts and stories makes you learn at the same time. It’s no different than reading a book, someone else’s story which in that case it’s the story of your closest friends or family.{Here goes away my reading detox, insert my “reading deprived” post 🙂 haha, okay okay I’m getting more serious now:) } The empathy you are creating while listening gets you into its whirlwind in some for of shape. Maybe that’s why it makes it hard to digest. The reality is on one side of your brain, you can’t help but think what you would do if you are in their shoes. {I don’t think you can ever get an answer to that but hey thats the job of your brain:P – It won’t stop wondering.}

“The more silent you get, the more you start hearing.” thats why while you are listening you are not only connecting with the other person but also with yourself .Every story takes you to another layer within you, deeper & deeper. Reflecting on things, seeing yourself in others’ stories even though you have nothing to do within it. That’s why I call it collecting the missing pieces of the puzzle. It all helps you, find yourself – in some form of shape.

Anyway, I now strongly feel like, it’s time for me to collect the missing hours of my sleep before I turn into a zombie:) Back at EST time zone.

Good night world, it’s 00:12am in Newyork {7:12am in Istanbul}

Ayca Xxxx



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